Bendigo Writers Festival – Day 1

Patriarchy and Place and Other Things I'm Thinking About

‘A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it’s in hot water.’ (Eleanor Roosevelt)

Thanks, Eleanor. Being honest though, if it was a man saying that I’d find it pretty patronising.

I’m at the Bendigo Writers Festival, a happy little book-loving getaway I discovered two years ago when the world was opening up (and before the world closed down again).

And my head is full. In a good way.

So here are a few things I’ve been struck by in some way, taken notes on in sessions, or talked at my husband about afterwards (or maybe all three).

1. Maybe women-tea-bags are steeped in hot water a bit too often?

The concept of the Glass Cliff was, weirdly, a new one to me. It’s the phenomenon, identified by Michelle Ryan (who was there) and Alex Haslam (who wasn’t), that women are more likely to take leadership roles in times of crisis or risk.

That is, women more often take the helm when the ship’s sinking and the men have all jumped onto the lifeboats. If the boat sinks, well. At least we gave a woman a go. But she couldn’t prove herself after all. Good thing we didn’t lose all those great men with all their great leadership qualities.

Think Theresa May and Liz Truss Steve Bradbury-ing the UK leadership (and, inevitably, tanking). Christine Holgate with the Australia Post thing. Marissa Mayer taking on Yahoo! when it was bleeding on the silicon floor. That woman you’re thinking of right now who was elevated to a management position when the whole department was falling apart. And so flipping on.

Sometimes the crisis isn’t known until the woman takes the role (hence ‘glass cliff’ not ‘cliff you can see from miles away’). Oh, did we not mention the business has been running at a loss for a year, the roof needs replacing, we’re being investigated for systemic wage theft and the toilet in the break room is leaking into the kitchen? Soz.

In a separate session, Richard Denniss told us that about two-thirds of Australia’s superannuation funds belong to men.

And we say, yes of course, that makes sense. Because women take on more caring roles that keep them out of paid work. They also take on more caring roles that are paid work — just not paid very well. And often they’re working part-time because of all the caring.

But it doesn’t make sense. Sure, 11% of a big number is more than 11% of a smaller number. (Follow me for more helpful maths tips.) That doesn’t mean that people with the big numbers are more deserving.

Patriarchy, hot water, crisis, pressure to care. And the reward is less support in your old age.

Sign me up.

2. Asking questions is scary

A helpful lesson for us all.

This isn’t a deep philosophical insight gleaned from the wisdom of smart people on stages. It’s just that I got brave and asked a question and I didn’t communicate it quite the way I intended and I think I came across as a bit un-feminist and ignorant. So that’s a shame.

Teensy bit of context: there were some positives put forward in the Glass Cliff session, like great examples of head-and-heart leadership. Naturally, Jacinda Ardern was held up as an exemplar.

From what I can see, admitting it’s from across a ditch of sorts, I’m a pretty big heck yes when it comes to Jacinda Ardern’s leadership style. But — and hear me out, because history tells me I might not get this across very well and you might need to interpret a bit — she needed to stop.

It was put forward in the session that it’s great that she stopped when she felt that she needed to. And that many people (especially men, if I may be so bold) would just limp along until they were pushed out. I totally agree — it’s another example of great leadership to have the humility to step down when you need to. And people very often need to.

Wouldn’t it be nice, though, if great leadership didn’t break the great leaders? Why should leading with heart, showing empathy and kindness but not being a pushover, inevitably lead to burnout?

Imagine if we could teach our future leaders — the girls, boys and kids of any gender — that they can be real people. Be kind, be strong, care, walk in your authority. And it won’t wreck you. When you move onto the next thing, it’ll be because it’s a great opportunity, not because you have to leave the thing you’re in now.

What if we could teach the value of self-care as well as caring leadership?

Anyway, that’s what I was trying to get across. But I fudged it. So I have no reason yet to debunk the theory that asking questions is scary.

3. Love is a thing and probably always will be

I was a bit late, but I went to a session with Madelaine Lucas talking to Christos Tsiolkas about her new book. And it’s about love.

Of course, this is a published work of literary fiction, so it’s about complicated love. ‘Relationships have arcs,’ she said, ‘especially ones that end.’

But what I appreciated was that she talked about different kinds of love and relationships. Loving yourself through the freedom of water. Family being all kinds of things: a mother and daughter, a group of housemates, a couple. So that was nice.

4. Some writerly things, because it’s a writers’ festival

(Side question for those playing at home: is it a festival for writers, or a festival of writers? Discuss.)

Here are a few things I took from today:

Start a novel (or maybe anything?) with your best material.
Find the thing that’s special about your voice and nurture it. And look to other writers to lead the way.
Sometimes writers see characters play out their stories like they’re watching a movie; other times they have to kind of conjure them into being.
Simple, everyday stories can be relatable and also help to break preconceptions (about a place, person, culture, etc).
Writing can build a community through the sharing of people’s stories and commonalities.

5. The value of place and also UFOs

Having lived overseas, I know the concept of home can be somewhat fluid. But there’s still something about a place and its soul. The way you feel when you turn a certain street corner, or walk into a familiar cafe, or see someone at the supermarket that you also saw walking by the river a few days ago.

The different angles of light that fall into your lounge room as the seasons change. The rhythms of traffic, the gentle morning alarm of birdsong.

Three guests, who have all authored location-centred books, discussed their different interpretations of the ‘soul’ of a place. One standout story was about a teacher (not present) who went to a remote community with low literacy. There was very little interest in reading books among the kids, so this teacher decided she’d write some books herself. She set them in their community, with their culture, their shops and their vibe. And they started reading. I love that.

Others talked about food, nature, the people, the mundane, the real life in the ’burbs.

There was also mention of — get this — a UFO that landed in the Melbourne suburb of Westall in 1966. I would like to know very much more about this event.

Until tomorrow then

I’ve still got two more days here. My poor brain will be very full of thoughts and ideas and confusions by the end. But that’s ok. Maybe all this bookish immersion will lead me to a book one day. Watch this space.

Meanwhile, I’m off to find out more about that UFO. I’ll let you know what I discover.

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